Following... others... or...

I was thinking about something, just this second.

I don't have, well normally don't have, a following nature. Or so I thought.

Have a struggle at my "day job". I am having a hard time responding to situations on my own in my own words. I feel like I can have a ghetto attitude that I need coaching, but it seems like I am being coached ALL THE TIME and am becoming less confident that I can handle a situation. I never... I used to be different. I was confident in my speech. My self-confidence has been shattered by years of an self-abusive mental relationship that I have had with myself.

Why does this make me a follower instead of leading my own path? Because I am no longer confident enough to pick up my walking stick and go. I am too worried about shit. Like money, I hate it I love it. Like my daughter, like time. Whenever someone says something, instead of disagreeing like I want to, I agree. Why?


so my randomness has hit and it has led me off the blog and past my sleeptime...

bye bye